{"id":3050,"date":"2011-12-01T18:24:26","date_gmt":"2011-12-02T01:24:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/?p=3050"},"modified":"2011-12-12T05:53:59","modified_gmt":"2011-12-12T12:53:59","slug":"i-just-remembered","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/?p=3050","title":{"rendered":"I just remembered."},"content":{"rendered":"

My last post might have left the impression that I have gotten lazy.\u00a0 In honor of the many hard working farmers and parents in my community I figured I should correct that idea.\u00a0 So I sat in the window seat, watching the birds at the birdfeeder, soaking in some warm sunlight, sipping a hot chocolate, and thought really, really hard about what I’ve been up to lately.\u00a0 And I remembered that the hose broke once and had to be cut, mended and reattached.\u00a0 Which was stressful.\u00a0 Because I could only work in short bursts inbetween petting the new fluffy headed chickens that we traded one of the kids for (By kids I mean, baby goats<\/em>.\u00a0 Not children<\/em>.\u00a0 Because children are worth way more than some cool chickens.\u00a0 Well, most of the time.)\u00a0 This counts toward farm work.<\/p>\n

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Also, I took the kids (by kids I mean, children<\/em>.\u00a0 Not baby goats<\/em>.\u00a0 Please try to follow along here.) back to the local river to try crossing it while the water was low.\u00a0 Which counts toward parenting work.\u00a0 And only sounds simple and easy.\u00a0 In reality, it involves a plethora of educational constructs and character development including but not limited to the following:<\/p>\n

1. Spatial thinking.<\/strong> By studying the arrangement of rocks, can you determine a safe path across to the other side?\u00a0 Consider distance between rocks (a 6 year old’s leg span isn’t going to reach as far as a 12 year old’s leg span) as well as ability of anyone over age 30 to to extend to full leg span without pulling a thigh muscle (we all know who that is).<\/p>\n

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2.\u00a0 Balance and coordination. <\/strong>Is one’s balance greater when standing at full height or when crouched with an extra hand placed on the ground?\u00a0 If one discovered it was easier to balance with one’s hand hand touching the ground would one share that info with one’s brother or let him continue blithely along upright until he fell and busted his knee?<\/p>\n

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3.\u00a0 Hypothesis, experimentation, and conclusion.<\/strong> If one is forced to step off the rocks, is it worse to wade into fast moving, shallow water?<\/p>\n

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Or slow deep water?<\/p>\n

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And does this count as slow and deep or shallow and fast?<\/p>\n

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Just so you’re not up all night wondering how this turned out, I can tell you that the conclusion is all types of river water have slippery, moss covered rocks underneath so don’t bother trying to distinguish between scenarios.\u00a0 You’re going down, my friend.<\/p>\n

4.\u00a0 Pain tolerance.<\/strong> Is age or personality a greater determinant in pain tolerance (i.e will the 8 year old handle a slip and fall better than the 12 year old)?\u00a0 Is it easier to keep from crying when you scrape 4 inches of skin off your elbow if your children are watching?\u00a0 Why does shouting cuss words immediately make you feel better?<\/p>\n

5.\u00a0 Animal behaviors.<\/strong> Is the best way to convince a dog to cross the water by leading the way, murmuring encouraging words, or dragging her by the leash, screaming hysterically that she needs to catch up before she pulls both of you into the water?\u00a0 Does the dog’s hesitancy to participate in this activity indicate how foolhardy it is?\u00a0 Are dogs smarter than humans?<\/p>\n

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6.\u00a0 Philosophy.<\/strong> Does kharma really exist?\u00a0 If not, why would one make it half way across the river without a mishap and only when one is raising one’s arms in shameless victory (mocking one’s siblings with their already scraped shins and soaking wet shoes), overbalance, fall backwards, and strike the back of one’s head on a boulder?\u00a0 Is it good luck or by the grace of God that this only results in a bump on the back of the head instead of a concussion or a cervical spine injury?<\/p>\n

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7.\u00a0 Emotional fortitude. <\/strong>What if after all the hard work and injuries to get across the river, you discover that it wasn’t worth it?\u00a0 As a matter of fact, it looks just like the side you came from.\u00a0 Even worse, there’s not actually a trail on the other side and the only way to get back to a trail is to CROSS THE RIVER AGAIN!<\/p>\n

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8.\u00a0 Risk and value assessment. <\/strong>Determine whether the experience of crossing the river had any added benefit or increased enjoyment when compared to the casual stroll down the river trail.\u00a0 Ponder the concepts of adrenalin junkies, extreme sports, and wilderness excursions versus nature observation, peaceful contemplation, and personal safety.<\/p>\n

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9.\u00a0 Animal identification. <\/strong>Try to remember whether it’s an opossum or a raccoon that leaves a 5 toed foot print in the mud.\u00a0 Move quietly enough down the trail that you can get a good glimpse of the heron fishing in the shallows instead of scaring him off.\u00a0 Let everyone peek through the camera when it’s on zoom to determine if that turtle sunning on a log is a painted turtle or a snapper.\u00a0 Ooh and aah at the sight of an osprey suddenly diving into the water\u00a0 from a large oak on the other bank and then peeling away with empty talons.<\/p>\n

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And, most important of all, I taught them the golden rule of exploring nature:<\/p>\n

10.\u00a0 If you pack it in, pack it out. <\/strong>Whether it’s empty water bottles, gum wrappers, or a 6 year old whose legs are just too tired to make it back to the car.<\/p>\n

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See?\u00a0 I am incredibly busy.\u00a0 The public school system would have needed 3 teacher work days just to plan that many lessons.\u00a0 Besides, I’m saving my real stamina for when the water hoses to the barn freeze.\u00a0 And I have to haul bucket after bucket of water from the mud room sink out to the animals.\u00a0 While trying to decide how many gallons of water are really needed per pound of goat and how much will just get spoiled by the ducks dabbling in it.\u00a0 Physically and mentally exhausting.\u00a0 So I intend to enjoy fall as long as it lasts.\u00a0 Which won’t be long considering the kids (by kids I mean, well, you can probably figure out which ones I’m talking about now) brought home a Countdown to Christmas coloring sheet.\u00a0 My days are numbered.\u00a0 Literally.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My last post might have left the impression that I have gotten lazy.\u00a0 In honor of the many hard working farmers and parents in my community I figured I should correct that idea.\u00a0 So I sat in the window seat, watching the birds at the birdfeeder, soaking in some warm sunlight, sipping a hot chocolate, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[154,152,32,135,151,153],"class_list":["post-3050","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-so-you-think-your-kids-are-bad","tag-dog","tag-heron","tag-kids","tag-river","tag-rocks","tag-water"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3050","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3050"}],"version-history":[{"count":46,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3050\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3213,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3050\/revisions\/3213"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3050"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3050"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3050"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}