{"id":8255,"date":"2013-04-14T06:08:42","date_gmt":"2013-04-14T13:08:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/?p=8255"},"modified":"2013-04-23T03:09:20","modified_gmt":"2013-04-23T10:09:20","slug":"completely-compatible","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/?p=8255","title":{"rendered":"Completely Compatible."},"content":{"rendered":"

I’m used to wearing a lot of hats around here.\u00a0 On any given day I’m the mom, the cook, the landscaper, the farmer, the construction worker, the plumber, the veterinarian, the housekeeper, the seamstress, and the accounts payable office.\u00a0 I have barn clothes, business suits, work uniforms, and church dresses in my closet.\u00a0 But this weekend, for the first time, I got to be something entirely new.<\/p>\n

A groomsmen.<\/p>\n

That’s right, I stood up in my work partner’s wedding.\u00a0 On his side.\u00a0 With all the other guys.\u00a0 Which The Other Half enjoyed greatly.\u00a0 Because even though I spend as much time with my work partner as I do with The Other Half, now The Other Half knows he really doesn’t have to worry.<\/p>\n

“Hah!” said The Other Half when I told him.\u00a0 “All that time you spend together and he doesn’t even know you’re a woman!!\u00a0 Awesome!”<\/p>\n

Huh.<\/p>\n

I like to think my femininity shines through the 5.11 tactical pants and combat boots.\u00a0 Probably.\u00a0 Maybe.\u00a0 Eh.<\/p>\n

In any case, it’s a great honor to be asked to participate in someone’s wedding.\u00a0 (And a relief not to have to wear a bridesmaid dress.)\u00a0 So I prepared accordingly, using all my experience as a bridesmaid over the years.<\/p>\n

Early on the morning of the wedding, Pretty and I left to get mani-pedis at the local salon.\u00a0 And then we were no good for the rest of the day.\u00a0 Not that there weren’t tons of things we needed to do this weekend.\u00a0 But because once your nails are done, there aren’t too many hats you can wear around here without ruining that beautiful hot pink polish.<\/p>\n

Scrubbing a sink full of dirty dishes?\u00a0 Not without leaving a chip in your fingernails.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Mowing the lawn after 2″ of rain and and a 4″ growth spurt?\u00a0 Not without turning your perfectly polished feet green.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Digging through the boxes in the shed to get out the summer clothes?\u00a0 Not without ripping a nail.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Move the pig pen to its next location in the garden?\u00a0 Not possible without getting pig mud up to your ankles.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Turns out most of my jobs are completely incompatible with remaining neatly groomed before the wedding.\u00a0 Which would have made for a boring afternoon.\u00a0 Except for my groomsmen gift.<\/p>\n

Now, perhaps, like me, you’ve lived the life of “Always a bridesmaid, never a groomsmen.”\u00a0 So you’ve gotten plenty of bridesmaid gifts—matching earrings or bracelets to wear with your bridesmaid dress, puffy satchels to carry your lipstick and compact in at the wedding, soap, candles, silver picture frames, blah, blah, girly blah.<\/p>\n

Here’s what my partner gave me as my groomsmen gift.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

And, as it turns out, it goes perfectly with the state of helplessness associated with a mani-pedi.\u00a0 Completely compatible.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

It makes the time pass before the wedding as smooth as silk through your fingers.\u00a0 And prepares you for your important groomsmen duties.\u00a0 Which consist of standing around the parlor with the other groomsmen, cracking jokes, and sipping more alcohol while the women are closeted up, touching up make up, fixing fancy hairdos, arranging skirts, and calming the bride.<\/p>\n

I have seen the other side, ladies.<\/p>\n

We are doing it all wrong.<\/p>\n

Because some things just don’t go well together.\u00a0 Like a nice mani-pedi and getting the chores done. Or a lot of stress and fuss before the big event.<\/p>\n

And somethings go together just perfectly.\u00a0 Absolutely perfect.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Congratulations, Nils and Courtney.\u00a0 Thanks for letting me be part of your special day!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’m used to wearing a lot of hats around here.\u00a0 On any given day I’m the mom, the cook, the landscaper, the farmer, the construction worker, the plumber, the veterinarian, the housekeeper, the seamstress, and the accounts payable office.\u00a0 I have barn clothes, business suits, work uniforms, and church dresses in my closet.\u00a0 But this […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8255","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8255","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8255"}],"version-history":[{"count":18,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8255\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8298,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8255\/revisions\/8298"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8255"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8255"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/ruffledfeathersandspilledmilk.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8255"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}