Falling Asleep.
Posted on | December 1, 2011 | 1 Comment
I’ve heard people say, “Summer time and the livin’ is easy.” Which just goes to show they didn’t have weeds to pull, cucumber beetles to pluck off the vines, and 100′ of hose to drag down to the garden when the drought set in. Around here, fall is the season for putting your feet up. As soon as the summer starts winding down, the time consuming crops like zucchini and corn, eggplant and beans, and squash and melon are pulled up and sent to the mulch pile. No more trying to figure out what pest is eating the leaves, whether that’s a fungus or mildew, and thumping fruit or splitting pods to see if the harvest is ready. Yes, the summer garden is a diva, alright, and although her beauty shines, she has a tendency to go on and on about split ends, a cracked nail, and God forbid if she thinks the Japanese beetles are making her look fat. Read more
Tags: broccoli > brussel sprouts > cabbage > carrots > garlic > lettuce > mesclun > mushroom > onions > potatoes > radish > spinach
Late Arrivals.
Posted on | October 15, 2011 | 2 Comments
Animals are supposed to know what season is best to rear their young. Some kind of biological clock that tells them when the days are getting longer, the sun is getting warmer, and there is an abundant feed supply. Apparently, the animals around here have lost their watches. Oh sure, the goats can blame me for this year’s late deliveries because I am the Gate Keeper to the buck pen. Although, the Gate Keeper’s authority only barely exceeds that of the the Fence Jumper:
A Little Bit of Perfect.
Posted on | October 14, 2011 | 7 Comments
It was bound to happen. Even the cutest of kittens has a tendency to spread his claws and kill. But, still, my heart dropped when I happened to glance out the window during my morning coffee and saw Little Bit dragging a body through the woods. It was bad enough I woke to the chickens pecking up the freshly laid grass seed by the ditch. And that I discovered the daylily bulbs I left on the counter overnight had been heartily chewed on by the dogs. (Are daylily bulbs poison? If so, do dogs have to eat them to get the poison? Or just lick them and bite off the green sprouts? Do I really want to know by googling it or do I just want to ignore it and hope for the best?) Of course, my coffee filter had collapsed during brewing, leaving me with a cup so full of grounds that I was forced to put in 200 calories worth of Almond Joy flavored creamer to drown the taste. And now this. Read more
Renovations.
Posted on | October 12, 2011 | 4 Comments
A rainy day is usually an excellent reason to avoid farm chores. But since my other choice was to clean the red mold growing in the bathroom, I rushed outside to the barn to find something to do. Luckily, I didn’t have to look very hard to find a list of things to do in the barn. As a matter of fact, I usually avoid barn To Do lists because their length is enough to drive you back in the house to the bathroom. Instead, I squint my eyes so that the minor problems are blurry enough to ignore and only the most glaring damage is visible. This is called “visualization” and famous athletes use it enhance their sports performance. I think. Either that or Oprah created the term in order to live her Best Life. Since her life probably doesn’t include cleaning red mold out of bathrooms, it must be working for her. Read more
A Farm Day To Remember.
Posted on | September 10, 2011 | 5 Comments
It started out in the usual way. Read more
Tags: butcher > chickens > feathers > garden > guineas > milking > tractor > weeds
The High Price of Milk.
Posted on | September 10, 2011 | 2 Comments
Last year my haphazard breeding program led to goat kids being born in March, May, and July. Also to having to guess by color which buck sired which kid. Or determining if kids were old enough to be weaned or ready for their first round of CD&T by whether or not Pretty wrote about their birth date in her diary. This year will be less arbitrary. Less disorganized. Less dependent upon a 10 year old farm manager.
With that thought in mind, I decided that the does would be placed with their chosen bucks for the entire month of September. Assuming a doe goes into heat 7-10 days after exposure to a male, breeding should occur by middle of September. Therefore, goat kids should be born in middle of February. There. A plan. It’s a unique plan. It’s not the way most goat owners do it. I’m sure that surprises you. Read more
City People Have All The Fun.
Posted on | August 24, 2011 | No Comments
Apparently, there was an earthquake. Not the scary kind of earthquake that sends people running screaming into the streets. Just the kind that makes people look up and say, “Is that an earthquake?” Or in most of my friends’ houses, “Will you kids stop jumping around up there??!!!!”
It was the kind of earthquake that hasn’t been felt around here since the 1890’s. Or so They say. I don’t know how They know there was an earthquake here in the 1890’s. If you asked Them, They would probably say there are records or studies or data or something like that. Which is what They always say. And we always take Their word for it. Huh.
Anyway, it would have been fun to tell my grandkids one day that I remember the earthquake. My grandkids wouldn’t have to take Their word for it. I could tell them exactly when it hit and what it felt like and what I was doing when it happened.
Only I don’t know when it hit. Or what it felt like. Because I was fixing the roof on the barn when it happened. And I guess you have to be in a house surrounded by knick-knacks or working in office among cubicles and countertops to know when there’s an earthquake. Then there’s some rattling and shaking and stuff can fall over or off the walls or… well, I don’t know what. Because, like I said, I was on the barn roof.
There were no picture frames to shake. Or post it notes to fall. Or lamps and tables to wobble. Just chickens and goats and ponies and ducks, all staring up at me and Big as we cleared off leaf debris and patched holes in the roof with tarp. Chickens and goats and ponies and ducks don’t wobble or fall. They just supervise.
It is worth mentioning that Julia had been bellowing all day long in the barn yard. When we went inside for iced tea and heard there had been an earthquake, I got excited. Perhaps Julia was trying to warn us about the earthquake! A goat that can predict natural disasters would be worth telling your grandkids about. But when we went back out to add the branches we had cleared off the roof to the brush pile, she was busy trying to let Calico Jack into the ladies’ pen. Which means she was just in heat. Nobody’s grandkids care about that.
So only the city people got to experience a nice, safe earthquake where nobody got hurt. Now they will be able to tell their grandkids about it. Us country folk were probably all outside preparing for the hurricane that’s coming this weekend. You know roof checking, ditch clearing, tarp tying, generator testing, grain buying, blah, blah, blah.
That’s right. Earthquake. Hurricane. Goats in heat. End of times, people. End of times.
It happened to me.
Posted on | August 17, 2011 | 2 Comments
I don’t know how it happened.
I really don’t.
After all, I’ve never owned a creamer pitcher shaped like a cow.
Or salt and pepper shakers shaped like geese.
I don’t have tissue box covers that look like barns.
Or a milk bucket for an umbrella stand.
My curtains do not have roosters on them.
And the stove does not have burner covers painted with frolicking sheep.
There is not a single tin sign advertising eggs or milk in my house. Read more
It’s On.
Posted on | August 17, 2011 | 6 Comments
It happens on occasion. A predator stumbles upon our farm and discovers that:
1. There is a plastic container of dog food kept on the deck.
Weeding
Posted on | August 17, 2011 | 3 Comments
Don’t be fooled. Farming is not as scientific as it is intuitive. It takes sensitivity. Attentiveness. A discerning eye. Not just everyone has this ability. Take weeding the garden, for example. Some people will say that weeding should be done a little bit every day. At least every week. I don’t know about you, but there’s a lot of things I like to do on a daily or weekly basis in the summer. Like going swimming in my friend’s pool (All the fun, none of the work. Bonus!). Or taking the kids to the $3 matinee at the cinema. Maybe even sitting in the rocking chairs outside the local dairy, eating fresh ice cream. Weeding doesn’t even make my Top 50. And I tend to think anyone who suggests such a thing as daily weeding simply doesn’t have a friend with a pool, a $3 movie theater, or a local ice cream parlor. I’m just saying. Read more
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