Guineas Gone Wild.
Posted on | August 11, 2011 | 6 Comments
**Note from the author: OK, so I forgot to post Part 2 and Part 3 of my article for Farm To Table. There have been some complaints whining questions from people who want to know how it all ended. So I am posting the article in its entirety below. Please be aware that this article revolves around events that took place in May and June, so it’s a bit out of sequence with the rest of the blog. Especially since I wrote about some of the guineas’ antics in my earlier post, “Circumstances.” I tried to fix that but after 30 minutes of trying to display this post under June archives while simultaneously having it be current on Facebook, I got pissed off weepy bored with it and decided to leave it as it is. Please enjoy. And if you have any further complaints whining questions, please feel free to email them to complaints whining questions@my[spam]farmblog[spam].com. If you don’t get a reply, I apologize. Sometimes my spam blocker has a mind of its own and deletes legitimate emails. Go figure.
Guineas Gone Wild.
Guineas don’t do spring break. They don’t need a road trip and a beach to wreak havoc when the temperatures start to rise. They can create chaos just fine at home, thank you. And they do.
It began in May when their already exploratory nature became practically nomadic. Instead of 13 guineas roosting comfortably in the barn each night, I began to find only 10. Or 8. Or 5! Occasionally one would stumble in just as I was finishing the evening chores, disheveled and shaking his head as if to say, “You would not believe what went down underneath the cedar tree today, boys. You would just not believe.” Their usually tight knit group broke into ever-changing cliques, the males took to chasing each other, the females, and even a stray hen or two around the barn yard, and I think I found a few tags scrawled on the backside of the chicken coop. Although that could have been the rooster stirring the pot a bit.
This behavior resulted, as this type of behavior always does, in disaster. You can only spend the night huddled under the rose bush, too exhausted from procreational activities to drag yourself home, once or twice before the fox catches on. Setting up a love nest on the backside of the pond with your latest sweetie is charming, cozy, and right in coyote territory. Deciding to cross the road in search of new stomping grounds means, well, crossing the road. The road with logging trucks and soccer moms late for practice going at least Read more
There IS an Easy Button!
Posted on | July 28, 2011 | 5 Comments
Do you know what this is?
It’s an air plant. I bought several of these to decorate my beach room. I know, I know. A beach room? Have the kids grown up so much that I am actually decorating my rooms in themes? Themes other then Big-Enough-To-Put-the-Exersaucer-And-Still-Walk-By-Room or the Room-With-Chocolate-Milk-Stains-On-Carpet? My, how time flies. Can you believe we’ve already moved on to a bunch of pony wallies and an astronaut wallpaper border in the kids’ bedrooms? And the Dump-Your-Clean-But-Unfolded-Laundry-Here space at the top of the stairs is now the beach-themed sitting room. Well, Beach-And-Wii-Playing sitting room. Which is as close as we get to adult decorating (and a beachy decorating theme is as close as we’ll ever get to owning a beach house!). Read more
Kids at Play.
Posted on | July 27, 2011 | No Comments
Silly baby goats, slides and wagons are for…
…oh yeah,….kids.
Well, then. Enjoy!
How (Not) to Deliver a Baby Goat Properly.
Posted on | July 27, 2011 | 5 Comments
1. Disregard your training. Just because every goat owner you know will assist a birth if the doe doesn’t deliver within an hour of serious labor, doesn’t mean that you should. Wait. Wait some more. Feel free to sit with your goat when she starts pushing at 8pm, let her push until 11pm, fall asleep in the barn, and wake up at 4 am to find her still pushing with only an intact amniotic sac partially delivered. After all, if you ignore a bad situation long enough, sometimes it will resolve itself for the better. If it doesn’t, just squeeze your eyes closed really tight and go to your happy place. Read more
Check it out!
Posted on | July 26, 2011 | 4 Comments
Farm to Table Online asked me to write a humor column. I promptly sent them a submission that was so long they had to divide it into 3 parts. They were kind enough not to mention my inability to edit myself appropriately. Each part will be published on Monday for the next 3 weeks. Here is the link to Part 1. Enjoy!
http://www.farmtotableonline.org
Preservation Society
Posted on | July 20, 2011 | 2 Comments
There’s a lot of beauty in the wilderness. But when the pasture along the farm drive starts to look like this…
Circumstances.
Posted on | July 8, 2011 | 3 Comments
I am known for my brilliant plans. My brilliant follow-through, not so much. Which isn’t for lack of trying on my part. I put forth incredible effort. It’s just that Circumstances always get in the way. I hate Circumstances.
This year, my brilliant plan was to keep guineas in the garden to eat all the bugs. Guineas had almost eliminated the ticks on the property and I was hoping that, with a little encouragement, they would declare war on the squash bugs that decimate our crops every summer. The encouragement involved an 8 foot fence around the garden and the clipping of their wings before we locked them inside that fence. So maybe entrapment is a better word. But what’s a little semantics on the farm? Read more
Pollination
Posted on | July 5, 2011 | 2 Comments
The local planetarium held a special event to celebrate pollinators. It was educational. Outdoors. And free. The trifecta of summer fun. Read more
Happy 4th of July
Posted on | July 5, 2011 | 1 Comment
It’s that time of year again.
River Rising
Posted on | June 30, 2011 | 3 Comments
Right after the state officially declared us in a drought, we received a whopping 3 inches of rain overnight. The thunder rolled, the lightning flashed, and all that beautiful rain rushed into the creeks and rivers, carrying 1/3 of our raised vegetable beds with it. Leaving primarily only the unweeded parts of the rows behind. Say what you want about weeds, but they’ve got soil erosion nipped in the bud.
But if we didn’t want the zucchini to get entirely smothered…
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